Blogging Bridges: Envy, Jealousy, and Related Sins

Bridges offers a somewhat narrow definition of both envy and jealousy - envy is "the painful and oftentimes resentful awareness of an advantage enjoyed by someone else." Two usual conditions tempt us to envy: envy of those close to us and envy in the areas we value most. Jealousy is intolerance of rivalry, or a fear of someone becoming equal to or superior to us. I thought it was curious that Bridges leaves out covetousness in this chapter and instead focuses on the interpersonal aspects of these types of sin.

Three important reminders can help us in the fight against envy and jealousy: turning to the sovereignty of God (which Bridges understandably turns to as an important theme in dealing with many subtle sins); remembering we who are in Christ form one body, and each member belongs to the others (Romans 12:5, NIV); and finally, realizing that if we spend emotional energy on these sins, we "lose sight of what God might do uniquely in our lives."

Bridges also discusses competitiveness and controlling in this chapter as sins related to rivalry. The competitiveness section especially convicted me - the Pearces like to brag about our competitive genes (Killer Uno anyone?). Not that competitiveness in all forms is sinful, but Bridges says that it is basically an expression of selfishness. I don't think Bridges is advocating a fluffy anti-competition lifestyle (in fact, he encourages healthy competition especially among children and teens), but believes that the Scriptures emphasize doing one's best, working heartily, and seeking to bring glory to God in everything. Competition is good, but only in the context of glorifying God in doing our best. It might be easy to get sucked into bantering over semantics here - but Bridges is using "competition" in its sinful context - not in its gaming context. But competition in games can become sinful if we are ruthless or self-seeking for example.

Sometimes it seems like American culture is ultra-competitive, ultra-self-serving. Other times, it seems feminine (not in a sexist way, but in a cultural-studies/sociological way) and anti-competition. The former reminds me of a jungle mentality, the latter of a flaky one. But there is a balance, Bridges claims. I know too often I fall into the uber-competitive category and give in to the temptation to selfishness and self-edification. But Paul says in Romans 12:10 that we are to "outdo one another in showing honor" (ESV). This verse drips with love and bringing glory to God, and leaves no room for selfishness, rivalry, or competitiveness.

Blogging Bridges: Judgmentalism

At one point in ch.17 of Respectable Sins, Jerry Bridges defines judgmentalism quite simply as playing God.

This is an excellent definition. When we so elevate our opinions or preferences above the word of God, and pass judgment on others based on rules we have established, we are no longer allowing God's word to be supreme. "We are arrogating to ourselves a role God has reserved for himself" (p.144).

In Christian circles, as Bridges points out, this comes out frequently in areas such as...
- Worship music preference: hymns or contemporary?
- Church dress code: coat & tie or polo?
- Views concerning alcohol: abstinence or temperance?
- Doctrine: hypercritical, hypertolerant, or "just right"?

Because the Bible allows for different views, or different emphases, concerning these and other issues, it is sinful to judge others based on their choices.

Example #1: It is sinful to judge another for preferring hymns over newer music.
Example #2: It is sinful to judge another for preferring newer music over hymns.

How can both be true? Because in this area God has not mandated a preference. He has plenty to say about attitude, however, and that's where we tend to blow it when we begin to judge others. But worse - we play God. We decide that we can judge their hearts when only God can do this. We do this when we say, "If they loved the Lord they would...well, ultimately, they'd be like me!"

God has indeed spoken, however. This entire book - Respectable Sins - is premised on the idea that there is such a thing as sin, after all! Yet even when we are correct on an issue, we can be judgmental, says Bridges. We can "demonize" the one with the aberrant view. Their view may be unbiblical, in some cases heretical, but we can still play God in a subtle way - by passing a judgment on the person above and beyond what we really know about them.

This is why this simple definition works so well. Whether in areas of preference, or areas where God has clearly spoken, there is a tendency to elevate ourselves above our proper place. To assume more authority and knowledge and certainty than we really have, as we presume to know the hearts and motives of others.

Oh boy. There's not much chance of avoiding the sin of judgmentalism, is there?

All the more reason to remain humble...

Blogging Bridges: The Weeds of Anger

Combined with the previous chapter, anger is the topic of which Bridges devotes the most space. After reading the chapter, it's no surprise - anger is a serious, oft-overlooked sin. In many places, Paul includes anger with other "ugly" sins like bitterness, slander, obscene talk, conceit, and hostility.

This chapter is devoted to nipping anger in the bud. If we let our sinful, malignant anger fester, it can lead to "noxious weeds" of anger, which include resentment, bitterness, enmity, and grudges. Bridges offers three basic directions for nipping anger in the bud: always looking to the sovereignty of God, praying that God will enable us to grow in love, and learning to forgive as God has forgiven us.

The story of Joseph in Genesis is a great example of trusting in the sovereignty of God in all circumstances. When he was sinned against, he guarded against the temptation to become angry by firmly believing in the sovereignty of God. Romans 8 promises that in all things, God works for the good of those who love him. This good doesn't always mean that we will be elevated to second in command like Joseph, but it means that in every circumstance, God has our greater good in mind - becoming more like Christ.

In every circumstance in which we are tempted to be angry we are to pray that God will enable us to grow in love. This love, Briges says, doesn't just magically appear, but comes as "we pursue it diligently in dependence on the Holy Spirit."

We must also forgive as God has forgiven us. One of my favourite parables is when the king forgives an astronomical debt a servant owes him. This forgiven servant then throws another servant in jail who owes him a decent amount of money - but nothing close to the amount the first servant was forgiven. We are like the first forgiven servant - forgiven of a debt of sin so great that we can never pay it back. This debt is determined not by the severity of our sin, but by the value of God's glory and holiness. "Every sin we commit, regardless of how insignificant it seems to us, is an assault on his infinite glory."

It cost God to forgive us - the death of his son, Jesus. God paid our debt through Christ to forgive us of the enormous spiritual debt we owed. Because of this truth, we must forgive as we have been forgiven. "Until we acknowledge that we are the ten-thousand talent debtor to God, we will struggle with forgiving people who have wronged us in significant was or people who continue to wrong us." Overlooking someone else's sin does not minimize their sin, but their sin does not make our sin of anger right or justified. We are to forgive as we have been forgiven, and elsewhere we are charged to have a love that overlooks a multitude of sin.

My anger often comes when I have been sinned against. But it is not a righteous anger - it is an anger that comes from my pride and selfishness. I was convicted by Bridges' words that "while there is plenty of injustice that deserves a response of righteous anger, we should not use that as an excuse to evade the reality of the sinful anger that so often arises in our hearts."

Blogging Bridges: Anger

Jerry Bridges has some helpful things to say about anger in ch.15 of Respectable Sins:

Some people justify their anger as righteous anger. They feel they have a right to be angry, given a certain situation. ... Though the Bible does give some examples of righteous anger, such as Jesus' cleansing of the temple, they are few. The main focus of the Bible's teaching on anger deals with our sinful anger, our sinful reactions to other people's actions or words. The fact that we may be reacting to another person's real sin does not necessarily make our anger righteous. (p.122)

As Christians, we can be angry at the sin we see around us - in others or in society. In fact, Christians have become known for this! We've also become demonized for our "intolerance." Though to a degree these charges are false or misleading, there is truth to the fact that we can think our anger is "righteous" when really it's just self-protecting and self-focused.

We should ask ourselves: Am I angry at the ungodly attitudes, images, and legislation in this society because I so want God glorified and his word upheld? Or am I angry at these things because I want a comfortable life for myself and my kids?

There's a reason why we are so frequently cautioned against anger in Scripture. Anger is a God-given emotion, and reaction, to evil; and anger is meant to move us toward productive solutions to that evil. Yet it's as if we are swinging a sword around without the proper training - and it's cutting down everything in its path! That's why James says:

"The anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God" (James 1:20).

I encourage you to read this chapter by Bridges. He also addresses anger toward God, which has become increasingly "respectable."

Rest

And on the seventh day God finished his work that he had done, and he rested on the seventh day from all his work that he had done. So God blessed the seventh day and made it holy, because on it God rested from all his work that he had done in creation.Genesis 2:2-3

I was thinking today. We are often diligent to insure that those we are caring for receive the rest they need - our children especially. As soon as my son rubs his eyes, to bed he goes. Of course, we benefit from his naptimes, but more importantly we know he needs rest. Even concerning my wife, I'm very quick to encourage her to rest - to not try to overdo it.

And yet, we often fail to rest ourselves.

We are privileged to serve a God who commands us to rest. It's right there in Genesis, in the Ten Commandments, and throughout Scripture. Yet we often forget this, and think that God has called us to far more work than we are able to accomplish in a healthy manner.

Let's reevaluate how we perceive God's will for us. If it doesn't include rest, we're not in his will - we're out of it.

Don't rest until you understand this principle!

Blogging Bridges: Impatience and Irritability

The next chapter in Respectable Sins deals with an area of my life that is been a troublesome one - impatience and irritability. Bridges distinguishes between the two by defining impatience (at least in this context) as "a strong sense of annoyance at the (usually) unintentional faults and failures of others." Irritability refers to the degree or frequency of impatience, or "the ease with which a person can become impatient over the slightest provocation."

I freely admit, and Bridges wisely writes, that we tend to sin in these ways more readily in familial contexts - our true character often comes out around family. Though as a sinner, I have the ability to be impatient at any time, I tend to become more irritable and impatient when I am tired. In fact, I must be pretty hard to live with when I haven't slept in a while (right, Elizabeth?). In fact, as I write this, we are up in Pennsylvania for my sister-in-law's graduation, and arrived at 5:30 a.m. yesterday - so sleep has been scarce for us - which means impatience and irritability are right around the corner!

But Bridges did a great job in this chapter of calling me out on a tactic I use when I'm tired and irritable - he points out that context is no excuse for sin. Context, Bridges writes, "merely provide an opportunity for the flesh to assert itself." In fact, the actual cause of impatience and irritability lies within our hearts, not in my lack of sleep. I am just more prone to sin in those situations - I need to ask the Holy Spirit for even more grace and strength in those situations.

I am grateful that I have been made aware of this area of sin in my life, and like Bridges recommends, I have asked Elizabeth to help. More importantly, though, I need to acknowledge and repent of my impatience as sin - and not as excusable behavior based on the context. Moreover, I need to apply many exhortations of Paul in being patient: 1 Corinthians 13, Galatians 5:22-23, Ephesians 4:1-2, Colossians 3:12, etc.

There was a lot more in this chapter that is worth writing about and reflecting on, including overlooking unintentional actions, love covering a multitude of sins, and even how to not respond sinfully to others who are impatient. But I don't want this to become burdensome or too long.

Blogging Bridges: Self-Control

This is one of the best chapters in Jerry Bridges' Respectable Sins - ch.13, "Self-Control." That's true of most chapters, actually.

Bridges first points out that this is a significant biblical teaching: as one of the fruits of the Spirit (Galatians 5), its absence in one's life is deemed a serious defect (2 Timothy 3:3). Then Bridges convincingly illustrates how, as Christians, we often lack this important virtue:

Despite the scriptural teaching on self-control, I suspect this is one virtue that receives little conscious attention from most Christians. We have boundaries from our Christian culture that tend to restrain us from obvious sins, but within those boundaries we pretty much live as we please. ... And because we tolerate this, we become more vulnerable to other "respectable" sins. (p.110)

Bridges later speaks of a few specific areas where we "pretty much live as we please": food, temper, and personal finances. Ouch.

Bridges then makes this important note:

Biblical self-control is not a product of one's own natural will-power. We know there are plenty of unbelievers who exercise self-control in specific areas of life for the purpose of achieving some goal. But in other areas, they may live with little or no self-control. An athlete may be strict in his diet while totally lacking in control of his temper. (p.110)

In other words, the Christian's self-control needs to be generated by the Holy Spirit and a heart committed to godliness. It will manifest itself in multiple areas; it cannot be faked or "worked up."

Yet if we pinpoint in our lives one of the three areas Bridges mentioned - how we eat, our temper, or how we spend our money - I think we'll find that self-control becomes contagious. As we eat more selectively, we'll likely use our money more selectively. As Jesus said, "He who is faithful in little is also faithful in much."

And ultimately that's what this book is all about!

Good Pastors Die Young

This is a response to the last post (below), concerning Jerry Bridges' discussion of selfishness in Respectable Sins. I wanted to highlight something Bridges brought up at the end of the chapter.

During the time of the boubonic plague, in the mid-1300s, thirty to forty percent of Europe's population died. This is a staggering figure. Bridges notes that at this time, "Many priests cared for the sick and dying, and as a result, they too died. Other priests refused to help. It was said at that time that the best of the priests died and the worst of them lived."

I'd like to paraphrase that: The best pastors die and the worst ones live.

I think we can say that with confidence because Jesus said this:

"If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will save it" (Luke 9:23-24).

And the apostle Paul wrote: I will most gladly spend and be spent for your souls (2 Corinthians 12:15).

Also from Paul: I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me (Galatians 2:20).

Good pastors die and bad pastors live.

Blogging Bridges: Selfishness

The next sin that Bridges tackles is that of selfishness, which Bridges acknowledges is often much easier to spot in others than in ourselves. As such, our own selfishness is often more refined than the overt selfishness we dislike in others. Bridges addresses four areas of respectable selfishness - selfishness with our interests, our time, our money, and inconsiderateness. My subtle selfishness often shows up in two ways - one at home and one at work.

At home, I love to read during any spare time I have. Often, I sinfully put reading ahead of even spending quality time with my wife. This is selfish of me, and is a sin! At work, I am very protective of my lunch hour, and often I turn down offers to go to lunch with coworkers to have some relaxing time to myself (usually reading). But lately, thanks to a friend's subtle challenge, I'm wondering if this is a good use of my time. Turning down lunch offers every time, though it is beneficial and enjoyable for me, is selfish. After all, I could use that time not to build myself up, but to be an ambassador for Christ to my coworkers. When it's framed around the kingdom of God and the necessity to share my faith, hoarding my lunch time is selfish.

Paul writes in Philippians 2:4 "Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others." Someone who is unselfish is balancing his needs, interests, and concerns with those of others. On the other hand, the selfish person is "not only indifferent to the needs of others, but actually expects them to meet his needs and desires."

Jesus was the perfect example of unselfishness, as he became poor for our sake so that we might become rich (2 Corinthians 8:9). He performed the ultimate act of unselfishness in taking on the wrath of God on the cross to make atonement for our sins. That's the ultimate example of unselfishness for me to follow.

Blogging Bridges: Moral High Ground?

In ch.11 of Respectable Sins, Jerry Bridges discusses pride.

While some kinds of pride are far from respectable, there are a variety of subtle forms. Bridges discusses pride of correct doctrine, pride of achievement, pride of an independent spirit, and one that I'd like to discuss here - pride of moral superiority.

This is an election year. In fact, we've already had over a year of election coverage and by the time November rolls around the election cycle will have been nearly two years long. That's a lot of political news, and that's a lot of division between red and blue, Republican and Democrat, conservative and progressive. As "values voters" are courted by politicians, religious divisions are also exploited.

This is the perfect environment to grow pride. Especially the pride of moral superiority.

To understand how blinding pride can be, I point you to this earlier post. Here, I'd like to instead just paint an "election year picture" of someone who remarkably avoided the pride of moral superiority. That person is the prophet Daniel -- someone who was, in fact, morally superior to those around him! And yet this did not produce pride, but grace.

I've always been amazed by Daniel. In Daniel chapter 2, you'll see that Nebuchadnezzar was on the verge of killing all the magicians, enchanters, and sorcerers of the land. They could not solve the puzzle of Nebuchadnezzar's dream. However, Daniel was given the interpretation by God.

Think about it: To have all these pagans executed by the king would have been a tremendous boon to the "religious right." And their hands were clean - it was the king's decision, not theirs. Daniel and his friends would have complete hegemony in all things religious.

And yet...

Here's what Daniel says: "Do not destroy the wise men of Babylon! Bring me in before the king, and I will show the king the interpretation" (Daniel 2:24).

What was he thinking? Why didn't he let them go down in flames so that the truth could march on, unhindered?

Well, that's a good question, so let me ask you: what do you think gave Daniel this attitude? Why didn't he let the "wise men" (a technical term for these soothsayers) be killed, given that they were the religious opponents of the day?

If we can answer these questions, we'll be on our way to being positive representatives for the gospel during this election season. Our mindset should be one of love toward those with whom we disagree, and a desire to witness to the truth through lives marked by mercy.

Sober Joy

I seem to be thinking a lot about current Christian music and the attitudes it contains. My wife gave me Indelible Grace III (For All The Saints) for my birthday, and it's my third IG album (of their five). Indelible Grace's goal is to "help the church recover the tradition of putting old hymns to new music for each generation, and to enrich our worship with a huge view of God and His indelible grace." In the liner notes of For All the Saints, writer and producer Kevin Twit notes this big-picture mentality that they try to accomplish through their music:

This [album] has a mood of sober joy. I think reality is just sinking in a little more. The Christian life is not about closing our eyes and pretending Jesus turns all of our lemons into lemonade, and worship music should never be about helping us live out of touch with reality. Rather, worship music should deepen our gaze of Jesus and his beauty and at the same time, open our eyes to the brokenness in ourselves and our world. It should compel us to take up our cross and follow Him. We have been "ransomed, healed, restored, forgiven" - and that changes everything!

I think there seems to be a spectrum in the evangelical Protestant world related to sin and the gospel, especially as it manifests itself in "worship music." On one end, there are those who are so focused on and torn up about their own sin that they may seem to engage in self-inflicted punishment and also lose sight of the joy that bounds forth from the forgiveness of sin through Jesus Christ. The other end seems to have no concern for or realization of their own sin, and live as if their sin doesn't really matter ("happy-clappy" worship). When I'm "out of balance" on the spectrum, I typically fall toward the former, and focus on my own sin sometimes to a fault. I believe the right balance is the "sober joy" found somewhere in the middle, which Twit notes should be evident in our worship. Our worship (not only singing, but praying, studying, etc.) should make us more aware of our sin, more reliant on the Holy Spirit for sanctification, all the while focusing our eyes and our joy ever more on Christ. Yes, I am a great sinner, and a solemn realization of sin is of utmost importance in the Christian life (David's Psalm 51 for example), but without going to Christ for assurance of forgiveness, this mindset can be mundane or depressing.

But on the other hand, there are some songs that totally miss the picture - I'm thinking of the "I will" songs that Michael Horton often uses as examples of the watered-down, individual-focused worship songs so popular in the Christian sphere today. Songs that just proclaim the singer's intentions of "I will worship...I will bow...I will praise....I will sing...I will I will I will" without any context of why or without the focus on God totally miss the point by putting the attention on the singer ("look at me, here's what I'm doing"). We aren't doing God a favor by going to church once a week and worshiping on our own terms. On the contrary, we can only worship because through His infinite grace and mercy, God allows us to approach His holy throne in worship - worship isn't our right, it is our privilege. One popular worship song that is a prime example of this "I will" attitude doesn't even mention God by name - only by second person personal pronoun. I wonder what an unbelieving visitor would think if he heard that song being sung?. "Who are these people saying they will bow to? The pastor? The song leader?"

As a stark contrast, Indelible Grace's music has the sincere, deep texts of older hymns (often taken right from Scripture), but set to quality (and original) modern music. Examples on this album in particular include "Not What My Hands Have Done" and"Praise My Soul, the King of Heaven." The first track, "Jesus, I Come" might hint at the "I will" attitude through its title, but its lyrics are an example of coming to Christ out of our bondage and sin, recognizing that it's only through Christ that we have hope:

Out of my bondage, sorrow and night,
Jesus, I come; Jesus I come.
Into Thy freedom, gladness and light,
Jesus, I come to Thee.
Out of my sickness into Thy health,
Out of my wanting and into Thy wealth,
Out of my sin and into Thyself,
Jesus, I come to Thee. [verse 1]

I freely admit that there are many great modern worship songs that are Christ-centered. There are also some hymns that are of the "I will" variety. I also know that music often seems to be a polarizing, emotionally-charged topic. But my point is that there is a balance to be found in our worship between increasing our awareness of our own sin and the sin in the world (Twit uses the euphemism "brokenness"), while deepening our faith and love in Christ for His work for us. I still have much to learn about exactly what this means and looks like in a worship context, and I don't think I'll ever fully know until I worship perfectly in glory.

Blogging Bridges: Unthankfulness (or Giving Thanks in Everything)

The next "respectable" or "subtle" or "acceptable" sin Bridges deals with is unthankfulness. Bridges focuses on three main areas that we are commanded to cultivate as gratitude toward God. Each one was challenging and convicting to me, and I wish I had the room to write on each one. The first area is a thankfulness for salvation, which Bridges compares to the healed leper in Luke 17. Spiritually, our condition was much worse than the leper - we were dead in our sins and God gave us a new spiritual life. How much more thankful we should be for our salvation everyday! A second area we need to be continually grateful for is the abundance of blessings God has bestowed upon us.

The third area was probably the most challenging for me, as I realized that it is a serious "respectable" sin in my life (though I was also convicted by the first two as well). This area is in giving thanks to God in everything - including when circumstances "go awry and do not turn out the way we had hoped." In 1 Thessalonians 5:18, Paul says to "give thanks in all circumstances, for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you."

So often I engage in the sin of ingratitude during difficult circumstances. My (sinful) tendency is to be blind to the blessings of God in that circumstance, and to not give thanks to God until after the situation has past. Then I look back and specifically give thanks to God for getting me through and working through me (hindsight it 20/20, right?). I was using Romans 8:28 (...all things work together for good...) out of context and thinking that the situation would work out in the end.

But that's not the entire meaning of that passage, as Bridges points out. Instead, verse 29 goes on to explain that the "good" in verse 28 refers to us being conformed to the image of Christ. In other words, God intends all our circumstance - good and bad - to be instruments of sanctification, of growing us more and more like Christ. We are to give thanks in faith during every difficult circumstance, trusting God's promise to conform us to the image of Christ and to develop our Christian character through the situation. Romans 8 goes on to exclaim the promise we should cling to during every circumstance: Nothing can separate us from the love of God.

Bridges writes this helpful prayer for giving thanks during those difficult times:
"Father, the circumstance I am in now is difficult and painful. I would not have chosen it, but You in Your love and wisdom chose it for me. You intend it for my good, and so by faith I thank You for the good You are going to do in my life through it. Help me to genuinely believe this and be able to thank You from my heart."

Blogging Bridges: Destroying Discontentment

Jerry Bridges, "Respectable Sins" ch. 9 - Discontentment.

"Respectable sins" are those sins that we take lightly, but God does not. The next one Bridges covers is discontentment.

I just read the other day that people will spend more (and save less) depending on how much television they watch. The same holds true for time spent in shopping malls. This shouldn't surprise us, but it does point out that we live in a culture that is constantly stoking the flames of discontentment. Madison Avenue wants us (needs us?) to be discontent. That way, we will release hold of our dollars and sense.

In such an environment, contentment is rare. Yet God wants us to learn contentment. Some of us may be in God's school of contentment even now: When we are tempted to be disappointed with our possessions, circumstances, or relationships, God simultaneously urges us to exercise the muscles of contentment. These muscles may not get much use, but as we exercise them they will provide us with needed strength.

What most helped me in this chapter was this sentence:

"But as Amy Carmichael so helpfully brought out, it is neither in resignation nor submission but only in acceptance that we find peace."

There are many ways to deal with discontentment. We can resign ourselves to God's will, we can submit obediently to God, but that doesn't change anything but our outward response. To truly destroy discontentment we must accept what God has given. This distinction was very helpful to me, and provided a clear path for prayer.

A friend of Bridges provides us with this prayer, which you can make your own:

Lord, I am willing to --
Receive what you give,
Lack what you withhold,
Relinquish what you take.

And Scripture provides us with Psalm 139, also a prayer. Click here to read Psalm 139, or better yet, open the Bible in a quiet place and read through it. This psalm leads does not directly address discontentment, but it is a potent force toward contentment!

One final thought: Bridges wisely reminded us at the beginning of the chapter that there is a holy discontentment. This is a discontentment with our spiritual growth; we should always long for more of God and His Spirit. See Psalm 42. If we desire discontentment, let's at least be discontent about the right things!